13 Jan

In the course of our lives, we all get to a particular stage when it seems like we don’t know anything. To everyone around us, we’re dumber than dumb. All our decisions which seem brilliant at conception and inception almost always end up biting us in the rear. This shows how absolutely unpredictable this life we live in is. Anyways before I start digressing, let me go straight to what I have to say today…..

This post was inspired as a result of some events that happened to the ‘character’ in recent times.


I am the only girl in a family of five with four older brothers, my closest sibling is five years older than I am and most times when I think about this I wonder ‘was I conceived by mistake or was I an afterthought?’ Because five years is really no joke and after four children one would expect my parents to have put a stop to child bearing, my mum especially, but that’s a story for another day. Anyways being the lastborn and hard as it is to admit this, I am spoiled silly, (show me the lastborn who would readily agree to being spoilt) but not in the conventional ‘lovey-dovey’ way. Although there’s nothing I want that I don’t eventually get even if I was refused at first, so long as its not outrageously expensive or stupid. I wasn’t born with a silver spoon, infact a wooden spoon accurately describes it better but times, like they say change and when it did, we became more comfortable.
Of all my siblings, I’m the only one who on finishing from a private secondary school, proceeded to a private university and this is where it all begins.
You see, I lost my Mum when I was still in secondary school so my transition to womanhood was and is still a bit faulty, for instance I still don’t understand why I can’t clear my throat or scratch an itchy bum in public?. I still feel more comfortable in a good pair boxers than thongs, tights, G-strings and ‘what-have-yous’. I am not a tomboy though, I have all the right curves in the right places and I’m yet to meet that Guy with blood pumping through his veins who wouldn’t give me a second look when I walk past. Though I learnt the hard way how not to dress from friends, roommates, coursemates in the university, I must say I learn fast and well. I now ‘rock’ the best designers I can afford at least, and no matter how shabby I want to look, I tend to stand out.
I never knew I had real fair skin until I got into the university and learnt how a lady really takes care of her skin, and by the time I came back home for the first semester holidays, I had gone from a ‘-1’ to a well rounded ‘8’.
Anyways that’s enough background information for now.


I’m in my final year now and trust me a lot of water as gone under the bridge like they usually say and though there’s a lot I want to tell you about myself, (If Tolu Oke will allow) like my first real kiss, (Real because the earth really shook) my first sexual mistake ( Trust me, it was a real mistake) and more; but I’ll just seek for your advice on this and maybe if ‘He’ allows, you will be hearing more from me in the nearest future.
‘Final year no be beans’ like the saying goes is so true, the ups and downs of university life, 100-400/500 (as the case may be) can get very overwhelming and final year brings a welcome sigh of relief. For all those who have experienced it, you all know what I’m talking about. Final year is not a joke though, far from it you work your ass off to make sure you don’t have any surprises, its the hardest, most stressful year in the university but it is good stress. So I’m in my final year, seen it all, the good, the not so good, the bad, and the ugly, not quite done it all though close. Anyways its the final semester and though we’ve resumed, I’m at home; what I usually do is to go to school, finish my registration and come back home for a week is two before resuming fully. My dad who is now retired from civil service took up private practice as a consultant in one of our church’s hospitals in another state, so it was only my immediate brother currently serving in Lagos who was at home when I got back.
‘Pls put on the generator’ I call out to him from the kitchen where I was preparing our supper of rice and fried plantain, he had prepared the stew before I came so all I have to do is warm it.
‘They’ll soon bring the light back’ he answers
‘Ok’ I reply and continue cooking.
You see, Phcn light had been spoilt for close to two years in our neighbourhood and it was fixed recently so its availability is still very predictable.
True to his prediction, they restore power as I am dishing out the food and I quickly tune the Tv back to the program I was watching before it went off.
My dad is home for the weekend, so evening devotion is a must and as soon as its over, I resume my position in front of the Tv. My addiction to the Kardashian family knows no bounds, soon as they became a topic of discussion among my friends I made it a point of duty to keep myself updated on their activities.
I’ve had a long day, the stress of registration in school, combined with traveling and last but not least cooking and predictably soon, I doze off on the couch and by the time I wake up, I see my dad switching off the Tv and decoder but I stop him from switching off the main socket because we were charging some rechargeable lamps at the socket.
I enter my room and fall asleep immediately…

Very soon, I hear my dad’s voice as he shouts my name and I’m out of bed immediately, opening my eyes to a room filled with smoke. Confused, I find my way to the sitting room to find it even worse than my room, I can hardly see anything but soon my eyes adjusts and I see my dad trying to locate the source of the smoke.
One of the lamps we were charging had caught fire and the whole house was covered in smoke. Apparently, the lamp got too hot as a result of the continuous flow of current into it, so it burst into flames. My dad soon douses the flames with a bucket of water but still instructs my brother to switch off the main supply switch into the house.
It is 4.37a.m and we are in our compound, all the windows in the house opened, the back door opened, just to let the smoke out,  my dad and brother staring daggers at me as we wait for the smoke to clear out. They don’t have to say anything, their looks say it all ‘IT’S YOUR FAULT’ it screamed.

Please how is it my fault?


4 Responses to “Fire!!!”

  1. hardehyi January 13, 2013 at 8:31 am #

    I wonder too… How is it her fault ?

  2. iamolisebika January 13, 2013 at 8:55 am #

    i’ve been in a similar (tho not the same) position where everything is apparently your fault. it gets easier.

  3. manya January 13, 2013 at 11:31 am #

    Looool…. You told ur Dad to leave d socket on… Thereby making it YOUR responsibility….

  4. Prof Ajayi January 13, 2013 at 11:37 am #

    In Fire Hazard its what we call human error which can be traced to u. And sth human error is very delicate thank ur God that d fire/smoke did not spread over a uncontrollable stage we be might talkin anoder story. Its ur Fault my Lady. Be careful.

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