Tag Archives: Love

I Do

11 Oct

Tolu was running late again. I should be used to this by now after being his girlfriend for over four years but it still gets to me, there was no way I would let him off the hook easy this time. We were supposed to see the premiere of this blockbuster movie together and I had made him promise to be on time this once but he was already fifteen minutes late. Thank God for the foresight that made me tell him the movie would start by 4p.m instead of the stipulated 5:30p.m, I wasn’t ready to allow his lateness ruin the movie for me.

After endless ‘Where are you (s)?’ to his phones and getting only the perfunctory ‘I’m on my way’; I gave up and decided to start the movie without him.

I chose my usual spot right in the middle row, and saved him a seat though I was extremely pissed at him. I checked my time again, it was 5:25pm and he wasn’t here. The lights in the cinema went dim as some movie trailers began, I brought out my phone and sent him a message ‘If you eventually decide to come, I’m in Cinema room two, our usual spot.’ To which I got an almost immediate reply ‘Okay baby.’ He even had the nerve to still call me ‘Baby’, ‘Baby my foot’, this was no way to treat the woman you claim to love more than life itself. I took a long draw from the cold bottle of soft drink I bought before entering the cinema and brought out my glasses as I settled back to hopefully enjoy the movie.

A slight commotion at the edge of our row announced his entrance, thirty minutes into the movie, the movie had taken my mind off him for a while but I quickly assumed the ‘annoyed posture’, arms folded, chin slightly raised with a straight face.
My breath got caught in my throat as I caught a whiff of his cologne, I had no explanation for that feeling but anytime I was away from him for a while, as soon as I perceived that odor, my knees always betray me. He wasn’t getting off easy this time, I reminded myself as he planted a kiss on my cheek, sending shivers down my spine.

‘Hauwa baby, I’m so sorry, something extremely important came up that I had to attend to’ He whispered into my ear as he playfully tugged at my earring with his teeth. My steel countenance melted as I burst into a giggling fit. I smacked his cheek and silenced him with a kiss, ‘Let’s try to enjoy the movie okay, and this doesn’t mean I’m still not pissed at you.’ I warned and he took a playful snap at my stretched finger with his teeth which I quickly withdrew. I settled into the warm confines of his chest as he wrapped his arms around me.

Few minutes to the end of the movie, it was paused and all the lights in the cinema came on,
‘We’re sorry for the interruption; the movie will continue shortly please bear with us.’ A voice announced over the speakers. We were all too surprised to say anything; we just kept our eyes glued to the screen.
The movie on the screen was removed and we were all staring at a blank screen, soft music started filtering through the speakers, it took me a few seconds to recognize the instrumentals of my favorite Nigerian Artiste, 2face’s Rainbow. I looked at Tolu beside me and he smiled, I was still pissed at him but I smiled back at him, rested my head on his shoulders and closed my eyes to be serenaded by the music. I was hearing murmurs from the crowd which was quite unusual, on opening my eyes, I saw a picture of myself on the screen, and then a smaller picture of Tolu faded into the screen. I sat upright and looked at Tolu but his face gave nothing away, he was as surprised as I was.

The volume of 2face’s Rainbow was increased and suddenly his voice came through the speakers loud and clear, singing over the instrumental being played. I looked at Tolu again, this time he couldn’t hide the smile that was on his face, he pointed at the screen and stood up just as 2face walked into the cinema with a microphone in his hand still singing.
Everyone in the cinema was too surprised to say a word; I looked at the screen and saw the words:
‘Hauwa my heartbeat, will you do me the honor of being the mother of my yet unborn children?’ Tolu was on one knee, hands outstretched holding a beautiful ring.


The Man who can

13 Jun

‘You’re a fool, you shouldn’t have sold yourself cheap’ she screamed at me, spraying my face with showers of saliva. She threw the money at me and continued ‘A meager #50,000? You must have been at your worst tonight; chief would have tipped even me better than that.’
Why don’t you offer him your asshole then? I itched to reply, but caught myself just in time to prevent a prolonged shout out with Madam. It was unlike her to come and meet me at the hotel as against our prearranged rendezvous points. She must be really desperate for the cash.
I could already smell her breath, a mixture of alcohol and marijuana, I was sure she would apologize in the morning when she sobered up but right now, the last thing on my mind was to even be here. I longed for the solace of my two bedroom apartment. I could feel the anger in my stomach moving upwards. My palm itched to hit Madam’s face but then I remembered why I was in this situation in the first place. I could only pray she doesn’t go through with her threat to expose everything.

I’ve always known her as ‘Madam’, that was the name she gave me the day we met at a bar where I was having drinks with my friends. We just finished a successful deal, the four of us netting #100,000 each. It would have been a larger amount, but I insisted that we stop the scam. I envisaged that even if we were caught, we could all rally round and get the money back.
We had finished our second bottle of red label and were on our way out when she signaled to the bartender to give us a third, we politely declined., but she insisted, hinting that she had a business proposition.
‘We don’t do business with strangers’
‘Oh snap out of it, this one will net you and your friends a lot more than the change you’re making now scamming unsuspecting housewives’ she said and took a sip from her glass.
‘I’m afraid you have the wrong crew’ I replied trying to keep a straight face, ‘How on earth did she know about us?’
‘Well’ she started then reached for her purse and threw a couple of photographs on the table, with well- kept fingers.
I made to pick them up but my guys beat me to it, sharing the pictures around them with several exclamations of ‘ohs’ and ‘ahs’ escaping their mouths.
‘Sharrap’ I snapped at them and snatched one of the pictures off Kunle the closest to me. My heart thumped loudly against my chest as I saw a pose of my naked self, face included. That was one thing we always guarded against, revealing our facial features in the pictures we sent to prospective clients.
‘Do you still think I’ve got the wrong crew’ She raised her head and blew a cloud of smoke in my face
‘What’s the meaning of this? Where did you get this?’ I snapped at her.
‘Oh cut the crap lover boy, I have a business proposition for you especially, your friends are just icing on the cake’ she replied.
‘Not before you tell me who gave you this’ I replied, fingers clenched in anger
‘Alright alright’ she said waving her arms in a circle round her head ‘Does the name ‘B-Slayo’ mean anything to you?’ she added.
How could I forget ‘B-Slayo’ the slime that cheated us out of our very first deal, threatening to turn us over to the police after we cashed in? He fell in love with the client, telling her everything about how we were poor undergraduates who dropped out of school for lack of funds and decided to run this scam. How we had kept sending pictures of our bodies only to a select number of women, especially those whose husbands we knew had no time for them; senators, politicians, business magnates. After they must have fallen in love with us, we then start blackmailing them, making sure they saw just one person out of the group. That person would also pretend like he was been blackmailed by the same crew to get whatever amount we wanted from the client, telling her that he also had never made direct contact with us.
We had it all planned out but B-slayo broke the first rule of been the contact, he fell in love with the senator’s wife that our net first snagged. The only condition on which he wouldn’t expose our real identities to her was if we would leave him alone and let him continue being the woman’s boyfriend which we had no choice but to agree to.
‘Now his single act of betrayal has come back to hit us in the face?’
‘From the expression on your face, I assume you remember him perfectly’ she said, snapping me out my reverie.
‘He’s a fucking chicken with no back bone, a weakling who is unworthy of being called a man…..’ I fumed.
‘Save me the sentimental bullshit and listen’ she broke in, ‘with a body and a face like yours, you shouldn’t ever want for anything money can get, your brother too.’ she added.
‘Let’s hear what you have to say then’ I said, through forced teeth.
‘It’s like this’ she started, ‘I’ll link you up with ladies who are actually interested in the services of young men like you, you’ll be their escorts for the day or night, depending on when they need you. You’ll attend to all of their needs whatever they are’.
‘And what’s in it for us’ I broke in
‘Money’ she answered, ‘lots of it at your disposal, ranging from #500,000 upwards for each client.’
Kunle interrupted ‘I assume you’re doing this from the benevolence of your heart huh?’
‘Smart-ass’ she replied ‘of course not, but I’ll be your agent, your link, whatever you choose to call it, and by the way you can call me ‘Madam’.’ She added.


The business proposition started off on the wrong foot as Madam almost swindled us out of our very first deal, but we were able to catch on quickly and got our share. As we progressed from one client to the other, Madam and I got unbearably close as her clients always had glowing praises for my services. I was satisfying their every need. She couldn’t but taste of the ‘goodies’ she was offering to her clients and I was very eager to satisfy her.
Very soon, my friends were conveniently left out of the picture as I became her one and only star attraction, peddling me here and there to anyone and everyone that could afford me. I soon became an open secret among the elite ladies of the society; I was even given a code name
‘The man who can’…

To be continued…


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